Kyle
The Anti Bullying Alliance (ABA) and the National Children’s Bureau (NCB) released their latest survey results on bullying amongst grades school and high school age children. Apparently the memo that startup founders, nerds, geeks and programmers are cool hasn’t quite reached the halls of middle and high schools across the country.
According to the study 90% of chilren between the ages of 11-16 have either been bullied or seen someone get bullied for being smart, intelligent or talented in some area.
We all know that the marketing and business development founders had their own school stores selling candy, discounted supplies or even homework. We also know that the brains behind most startups these days were our best customers back in grade school. They were also the ones who got picked on for being uber talented at computers or because their brains worked in overdrive while some students struggled with regular reading comprehension.
Apparently not only has that trend not changed, it’s gotten worse over the years.
While movements like Black Girls Code and Geek Girls, across the country are highlighting the talents of girls in grade school and high school, the study reveals that girls have it the worst when it comes to bullying.
“The research shows that more than a quarter of 11-16 year olds (27.3 %) have quit an activity they enjoy because of bullying, and almost half (49.5%) have played down a talent for fear of being bullied – rising to 53% amongst girls.” The study said.
Achievement in key academic areas is being stifled. 1 in 10 (12%) of children are saying they have downplayed their ability in science. One in five girls (18.8%) have downplayed their abilities in math and 1 in 10 boys are deliberately under achieving to avoid bullying.
Ross Hendry, Chair of the Anti-Bullying Alliance says the results of the survey are very worrying: “We know that bullying can lead to children missing school, failing exams, dropping out of sport, avoiding extra-curricular activities and limiting their life choices. It’s unacceptable that rather than celebrate their talent, they feel that they have to hide their gifts, purposely underachieve in crucial subjects and miss out on things they enjoy because of bullying.
“Government should take note. At a time when we need more young people to study maths and science at college and university, and to drive the future of our economy, they’re actually cowering away from fear of being bullied.
In the startup community we know how this all turns out. The smart ones end up being technical cofounders, and the hustlers end up being marketing and biz dev guys. Getting there is the hard part though.
The ABA offer’s these tips for children and parents:
For children and young people:
- Bullying is not your fault. It is always wrong and you do not have to put up with it.
- Let someone know what is happening as soon as possible. Talk things through with a friend, your family, or your teachers.
- Do not do or say anything in response to the bully. Stay calm and remove yourself from the situation wherever possible. If it is happening through your phone or the internet, keep a copy of the messages or images but do not reply or respond.
- Keep a note or a diary of what is happening.
- Be confident – you have done nothing to deserve this.
- Be assertive.
- You could say ‘This is not funny. This is bullying. This is wrong.’
- Think who can help you – young people or adults.
- Seek help from other young people e.g. school might have a peer mentor or buddy scheme
- Say to someone ‘Please would you watch what is happening here’ and ask them to help you report the incident.
- Sometimes it can help to talk to someone outside of the situation. You could call Childline on 0800 1111.
Help for Parents
- If you think your child is being bullied, don’t panic- try to keep an open mind:Your key role islistening, calming and providing reassurance that thesituation can get better when action is taken. Providea quiet, calm place where they can talk about what ishappening.
- Listen and reassure them that coming to you was the right thing to do:It may not be easy for a child totalk about being bullied so it is important to try to findout how they are feeling, what has happened, whenand where. Though at this stage it is not so muchabout establishing a set of facts as encouraging, talking and listening.
- Assure them that the bullying is not their faultand that you are there to support them: remind them that they can also have the support of family and friends.
- Find out what the child or young person wants to happen:help them to identify the choices availableto them and the potential next steps to take; and theskills they may have to help solve the problems.
- Discuss the situation with your child’s school:thelaw requires all schools to have a behaviour policywhich sets out the measures that will be taken toencourage good behaviour and respect for others andto prevent all forms of bullying among pupils.Parents can get advice and support from theFamily LivesParentline on0808 800 2222 or at www.familylives.org.uk.
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